Letting Go and Being Alone: The Solo Date

Letting Go and Being Alone: The Solo Date

Last week I decided a change was in order and began a new journey of self-discovery with the goal of re-centering my focus on taking control of my life and happiness. I found that spending more time alone and cutting back on socializing would be the best way to rekindle a once purpose driven mindset. There is power in solitude; step one in letting go and being alone: take your fine self out on a date!

I’m no stranger to eating out alone or seeing movies alone, in fact I quite enjoy doing things by myself. However, as of late I have been singularly focused on spending time with other people and little to none alone. This is the result of losing motivation and falling into a purposeless, floundering rut. Saturday was my first step in climbing out of that rut and my first solo Chloe date. My goal was to do things I normally would do with other people and simply be alone with my thoughts, responses and desires.I found that focusing on those three things made for an incredibly fun day.

The initial plan was to get lunch in the city and visit the SF MOMA but unfortunately my solo date had a bit of a late start so I decided to see a movie and do a little shopping. The great thing about a solo date is the complete flexibility – you have no one else to consider but yourself! I was a bit peeved I couldn’t stick with my original plan but reminded myself that no matter what I decided that progress was progress. Eliminating self-imposed pressures and expectations is something I’m tackling so I quickly adjusted to my new reality and planned to visit the museum next weekend.

After hopping off BART I headed to the food court at Westfield where I found the cutest vegan pan-Asian restaurant. I love bowl food, anything you can dump in a bowl with some lettuce and avocado is the preferred choice of meal for Chloe, plus I’m always excited to find new tasty healthy places. Unfortunately Loving Hut was not one of them; healthy yes, tasty no. I ordered the “Loving Hut Salad” which sounded great on paper: mixed green salad of tomatoes, onions, carrots, cucumbers, and avocado all tossed with a citrus vinaigrette dressing  with strips of pesto marinated soy protein.


The soy protein was simply not good so that was a bummer but the rest of the salad itself wasn’t bad (a tad overdressed and a pinch salty) and they gave me a bunch of avocado which pretty much made up for it. I may go back to try their vegan cheese cake and”Golden Rolls” which appeared to be their version of spring rolls. My first trip to Loving Hut was a little disappointing but my afternoon was saved with the discovery of a new juice bar!

Anyone who knows me knows I am obsessed with 1915 Cold-pressed Juices and Nekter Juice Bar but I am happily now obsessed with Pressed Juicery. I love finding new juices/Milks to add to my go-to list-which is sadly quite short-and let’s just say their Chocolate Almond milk is at the top of the list. I’m generally not a fan of chocolate or vanilla flavored milks but I love the Chocolate Almond because its super clean and incredibly flavorful. Almonds, Dates, Cacao and Sea Salt make up this rich chocolatey blend.


After the Loving Hut flop I was still hungry so I chugged the almond  milk and planned to return to Pressed Juicery later before leaving to pick up their Root 3 juice (apple, beet, ginger and lemon) because I couldn’t leave the city in good conscience knowing it was out there and I didn’t try it. I cracked it open with glee the next day only to find that the ginger was the star of the show. I love ginger in juice but unfortunately Root 3 was a bit rife with it. Overall the beet, apple and lemon pair very nicely together but the amount of ginger gives the blend a sweet hot poker taste. However, one sub par beet juice will not stop me from stalking the east bay location.

Foregoing the museum gave me a couple of hours to do a little shopping before I needed to get to my movie. I promised myself I would pick up some new shoes and slacks for work because at this point both items are almost starting to look like I don’t get paid at all. Luckily I ran into a Payless Shoe Store on Market St. where I found a new pair of black flats and the super cool shades below.


I hit up Nordstrom Rack while down there as well although what possessed me to go in I’ll never know. I can’t remember the last time I went to Nordstrom Rack; often times the rack price is still pricey so you definitely won’t find me there. I walked in thinking I’d find some new slacks but was too overwhelmed with all the shelves and people I quickly ducked into the dresses section and just stayed put. I didn’t find a new pair of slacks but I did find two amazing new dresses that I look incredible in. My favorite of the two is a beautiful form fitting black Tracy Reese business dress that is unfortunately much too flattering for my conservative admin job. However, it is always smart to have a few nice dresses on hand for future events; I’m also fairly certain I’ll be able to wear the dress at other positions. The dresses were a bit pricey and not a new pair of slacks but my philosophy is that if you find something that you love and feel all kinds of sexy in, grab that mess and run! After paying of course, no stealing folks.

My last trip was the Metreon, I hadn’t been in forever and got all turned around once I grabbed my ticket( which was another fiasco as well) and headed upstairs. Anyone else feel like the layout is not very…just not very good? After some shenanigans finding the bathroom I finally started to feel excited about seeing a movie by myself and being alone for the first time in a long time. I ended up seeing the new Star Trek movie in 3D IMAX which was amazing! The IMAX not the movie, yes the movie was not very good. It was entertaining, funny, action packed and comforting in its familiarity but certainly not as good as the first two.


Before heading back to the east bay I went back to Westfield to pick up the beet juice and grab a quick dinner. I had been craving pizza for the last week (that TOM) which led me to Pasta Moto where I reasoned that pizza could be healthy if it had a giant salad on top right?  I have to say I was quite impressed with Pasta Moto, the pizza was cheesy yet light and flavorful, completely satisfying my craving without causing that guilty bloated feeling. I am proud to say that I resisted the saucer sized cupcakes at Bristol Farms right next to the food court-a near impossible feat during that TOM.

By the time I made it to the BART station it was well past my bedtime; I was exhausted, irritable and certainly not excited about how well my day went. However, amidst my crabbiness I realized something – I felt confident, I felt in control and underneath the crankiness I was happy. I haven’t felt truly confident and in control in a very long time; it gave me a little jolt of hope that my decision to start my power in solitude journey was a wise one.

My first solo date was a bit of test run, a dress rehearsal for letting go and being alone. The success I achieved last Saturday is only the first step, and I am incredibly excited about my next one. I’m hoping I can go back to the city this weekend to finally visit the MOMA; stay tuned for my next solo date adventure!




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